I seriously had like three things I was going to blog about, none of which I can remember now. And seriously, they were important/good topics. Damn.
So, here's some mental junk for you.
I have never been one of those girls that wears makeup or does stuff with their hair everyday. I don't even do it "often". It's random and rare, usually reserved for very special occasions or when I just damn feel like it. Because sometimes I do feel like it. My mother always insisted, and still does, that when you feel - crappy - you should do the following:
1. wash your face (or have a bath, depending on time and inclination. )
2. eat something.
3. have a nap.
Sometimes it also helps to brush the hair; I have noticed that on the weekends, if I don't brush my hair I just can't get into the day.
So there's the makeup thing. My oldest sister works for MK, not as a MK lady but she goes to Dallas twice a year for like a month to work the behind-the-scenes part of the big conventions where they give away the fur coats, diamond rings and pink Cadillacs. She always comes home with bags and shirts and other stuff -- along with, of course, the latest "product", as they say. Cleansers, lotions, lipstick eyeshadow blush perfume mascara -- whatever is new, this time around.
So I apparently always have the newest colors, the hippest product. And I don't wear any of it, really. I do love the little perfume pendant, and I like the perfume when it is dispensed one tiny drop at a time; but I recently sorted out my collection of makeup and I still have a huge quantity for someone that wears it erratically. And I'm never really sure what colors actually look good on me, or how to figure this out. Makeup is too expensive to just *buy* random articles, just to try. I'd rather spend the money on books, or pens and paper, or Cheetos or something...
I apparently also have good hair. I don't know about this. It's curly and wild and I would rather it be much less curly and much much smoother and softer and tamer. I would so prefer some cute, easily maintained/manicured housecat haircut to the wild lion mane that I have. Add to this the fact that I work in a factory, and therefore it is either braided or wound into a bun, and we have me wanting to shave my head. Again. It's something that I think about more the less I want to do things with my hair. All of my sisters -- and my mom, I do believe -- have shaved their heads at one point or another. And they all look great. I don't think I can pull it off. I guess I am just too feminine, if only in my own mind. I like to think that I am classy/classically beautiful; but again, it could easily be in my own mind.
OH!
THAT was one of the things I wanted to talk about.
Over the weekend, I got called "CUTE". I don't recall ever being "cute". I've been "pretty" often and for a long while. I am occasionally "beautiful", but it's hard to take seriously. I don't think I've ever been "gorgeous", but that also is incredibly hard to take seriously. But anyway--
I was at a party, and was outside on the back porch where all the smokers were, and The God of Biscuits, etc. made some comments about the way my family is about something, I forget what -- and I drew myself up and put my hands on my hips in preparation to defend my clan, and the Goat burst out with "(Sleepwalker), you are so CUTE!"
( wtf? )
I was totally distracted from my defensive posture.
(Cute?
Where the hell did that come from?)
I have since then been wrestling with this idea. Cute how? Why not sexy, of alluring, or - something, I don't know. Why cute?
I asked Luigi about this, and he said it was something about how I moved when I went from relaxed and neutral to (I thought) imperious and righteous. The phrase "impertinent and saucy wench" was used.
again:
wtf?
Did I miss something?
I asked him again, the next day, and he said it also had to do with the fact that everyone knew that I wasn't really mad, so it was cute.
I'm still not sure I get it.
I have absolutely no idea what the movement was that provoked this response. I do this often, making a noise or a gesture that is totally non-reproduceable but is apparently very entertaining to whoever I am with.
Ok.
I think that's probably enough crap for today.
We'll try it again later.
